Carry me next to your Genitals every day so you never go back to Random workouts and Fart-in-a-jar diet plans.

This isn’t Another Transformation Challenge...

The Push Pull Health 30 Days to Sample the Goods Online Programme (working title) isn't a Facebook group where we all clap because you drank more water or hand you a certificate because you ate a piece of broccoli without gagging.

It's affordable Online Coaching that covers all bases of your health.

One that finally stops the cycle of you trying to overhaul your life every Monday.

Where you won't be shouted at by a protein bar on legs, telling you all your diet and exercise problems can be solved by simply "moving more and eating less" 🙄

FIND OUT MORE

A Look Inside The Team Rotter App

Personalised Training Programs

Workouts tailored to you, building strength, stamina, and toning up, ensuring you maximise every session.

Group Weekly Check-Ins

We check in with you weekly about your training and nutrition to ensure you're progressing

Personalised Nutrition

Calorie targets, simple meal ideas, and wothwhile education to keep you on track

Unmatched Accountability

When you have a coach watching your progress, you are far less likely to quit.

Access to the Community

Join members on a similar journey. Share wins, losses, get motivation, and never feel alone.

Ongoing Coaching Support

Don't suffer in silence. Message the team (me) with any exercise or calorie questions.

Goldliocks Workouts

Not too hard, not too easy, just right.

Everything can be tweaked, adjusted, or swapped—whether you’ve got dodgy knees, fake hips, a frozen shoulder, or the current strength of a wet digestive. I've recorded a quick video for each exercise, highlighting the three dos and don'ts of each movement so you don't end up in a heap on the floor.

Example Programmes include:

💪Milf Maker (Mums I Like to get Fitter)

🛍️Shopping Bag Destroyer (Increased Strength)

🍆Friends Reunited (Strip the Dad Bod to relocate your member)

AND

😏PG Kamsutra (Improve Mobility/Flexibility for all occasions)

Meals That Don't Make You Cry

Rather than give you a rigid meal plan that doesn't survive first-life contact, I'll show you how to run your own diet so you don't feel like you've failed every time you have an unplanned bag of Maltesers or bottle of wine...

We'll calculate your calories and macros (protein, carbs, fats, & alcohol 😱) based on your goals (losing weight, toning up, building muscle) to ensure you finally achieve long-lasting results.

To ease you in, I'll provide example meal plans, shopping list recommendations, and guides for eating out (steady) and low-calorie alcohol swaps (if you care)

The point of all this is to equip you with the tools, knowledge and, more importantly, the confidence, to maintain a realistic, sustainable diet in preparation for when we are sick to death of each other!

Like a proud father on your first day of school, I'll wave you off, overjoyed in the knowledge that you and your health can now stand on their own two feet😢🖕

A Diet You Can Stomach

You've probably tried every wacky way of eating under the sun:

🤢 No eating after 6 pm

🤢 Counting Points & Syns

🤢 Detox teas

🤢 Prepackaged meals that taste like Nan's farts

Let me guess...

They all failed.

Or worked temporarily—until life reared its ugly head.

We do diets differently.

  • No miserable 6-week quick-fix plans 🩹
  • No avoiding bread 🏃‍♀️‍➡️
  • No pooping the bed because you ate half a KitKat and washed it down with a Pepsi Zero 💀

You get a nutrition plan built around your actual life, not a fantasy version of yourself that starts meal-prepping quinoa at 5 am with a smug grin on your face!

OUR DIET OPTIONS

General

Vegetarian

Vegan

Dairy Free

Gluten Free

And More !

FAKE FOMO 🤥

I am sure you've come across a version of the following advert:
I'm seeking "insert made-up number" of people who want to tone up, burn belly fat, skyrocket their confidence, while eating ALL the foods they love (no chicken and broccoli), and maintain their banging social life!!!!!
😩 5 stressed-out mums constantly snacking (aren't all mums... stressed?)
🍟 10 busy professionals who only eat McDonald's (aren't all professionals...busy?)
🍻 12 men over 40 whose beer belly has swallowed their pecker ( aren't all... ok, I'll head the search party.)

🤬 119 menopausal women who have no energy and hate everyone (same)

AND...

It just so happens that today is the last day to register!

👉 Early Bird Offer (I'm not worth it)
⏰ Final call! (I'm getting desperate)
📣 This will sell out! (it won't)
⏳ Once it’s gone, it’s gone! (until next week)
👋 No one loves you, buy now! (fair enough)

Translation: I don’t have many clients, and these are the overused marketing tactics to create urgency and the belief that I’m in demand.

Don't worry...

The Timer Starts again in

15 Minutes🙄

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Days
-
Hours
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Minutes
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Seconds

Meet the Team

Ben Davis - Owner

Here at Push Pull Health, I pride myself on not letting you settle for paying through the nose for rubbish standards.

Ben Davis - Trainer

Nothing shouts PT more than the "serial killer grin, awkward folding of the arms, I'm in charge but also fun to be around kind of look".

Ben Davis - Rule Breaker

The time I did a photoshoot.

I just forgot to starve myself.

I think the fake tattoo and streaky tan really bring out my eyes.

HANG ON A MINUTE...

This isn't my first rodeo.

How do I know this isn't yet another half-baked fitness app that promises the world but delivers more bitter disappointment? 

Stop speaking in riddles and tell me exactly WTF I get.

Woooooaaa, fucking taking it easy. I'm getting to it!

Potty Mouth.

WHAT YOU GET 🤯

  • Tools to navigate the weekends & social occasions without freaking out about going 'off plan'
  • A routine that works even when you're stressed, tired, hormonal, or can't be arsed (99% of the time)
  • Habit-based and behaviour change coaching that doesn’t rely on your fleeting motivation
  • 100's of simple meal ideas and low-calorie swaps that educate rather than demonise
  • Daily support, guidance and accountability
  • Unpack why every other diet and exercise plan failed and fix the root cause
  • Everything in one place—no PDFs or spreadsheets

WHAT YOU DON'T GET 🤬

  • Labelling foods "good or bad" or with points or syns
  • A calorie target a Victorian orphan would sniff at
  • Another cheerleader not willing to call you out (lovingly) on your shit
  • Another mate or family member making snide remarks because you're trying to better yourself
  • Workouts rammed full of burpees and star jumps
  • The same boring health advice wrapped in a shiny new wrapper
  • Uninspiring, inspirational weekly 'You got this' messages
  • A weighing scale glued to your feet

HOW TO GET STARTED FOR ONLY £9.69/week...

FIND OUT MORE

(The use of 69 is 1. To save you a whopping 31p. And 2. Because I'm a child.

Feel free to WhatsApp me your funniest fitness meme, and I can answer any questions before you commit to your life-changing results.
👇🍑

PREPARE YOUR CHEEKS

OHHH, COMMUNITY FRIENDS

Start for You, Continue for the Community

This is where you realise you're not the only one who’s jacked it in 69 (hehe) times before.

Everyone has that same voice in their head: “I'll start Monday again, but this time it will be different...”

This time, it will be.

When you’re starting, it’s all about you, and so it should be.

However, the community is where you can begin to relate.

When the urge to give up again rears its ugly head, and you're tempted to add this experience to the growing pile of previous failed attempts, the community will have your back.

You’ll see and speak to me more than Fiona (leprechaun, swears a lot) and Donald (the cun*t), sorry, cat does.

MORE BENEFITS OF JOINING TEAM ROTTER

REALISTIC EXPECTATIONS

Translation:
A routine that factors in the grim realities of waking up most days not wanting to exercise but wanting to eat everything in sight.

STRENGTH & CONFIDENCE

Translation:

Carry all the shopping in one go and stop wasting energy on NOT being yourself.

STRESS REDUCTION

Translation:

Become a less stressed and better version of yourself so you can start turning up more for your kids, family and friends.

Time Efficient

Translation:
Mastering daily-ish habits. Its continuing to turn up on your 'bad days' that count. Finding your laughables.

WEEKLY WHINGES

Group calls that break up the monotony of life’s daily rot—while leaving you empowered, energised, and feeling a little less 💩 about doing it all again next week.

Once a week, you get the chance to offload everything that threatens to veer you off course, such as:

🖕Dealing with the kids being shits. (again)

🖕Work and adult responsibilities continue to drain the last bit of energy you had to exercise and eat healthier

🖕The mother-in-law sticking her ugly beak in (again)

🖕Nearly smashing the fuck-it button 69 times. (And it's only 9.01 am on Monday)


All while dodging charlatans trying to flog you their hormone-balancing detox toning butt plug.

The Weekly Whinges can't replace actual therapy, but I promise they will be bloody cathartic! 

Designed to stop your health habits from turning into yet another thing quietly ruining your week and making you feel like a failure. 

❌ No weekly performance reviews like you've taken on a second, even shitter job
❌ No motivational “you’ve got this” inspo-porn to help see you through another week
❌ No pretending everything’s fine when your fridge is whispering sweet nothings in your ear at 11 pm

Just blunt, practical support that cuts through the noise and makes you feel slightly more seen.

These aren’t just calls to escape to—they’re where you finally start making sense of it all.

🤩 Nuggets of wisdom.
🤯Aha moments.
💪Actionable takeaways.

And a constant stream of perspective that’ll stay with you long after you’ve given me the 🖕, and built up the confidence to do this 💩 by yourself.

TAKE THE PLUNGE

Highly Arousing Bonuses 🚿🍆

Have you ever found yourself halfway through a plan, googling “why do I always fuck this up”?

Good.

Unlocked after your first 30 days of educational content, and to build on our Weekly Whinges, the On-Demand Video Library will delve deeper to help fill in the gaps.

Finding a form of Exercise you can Stomach and a Diet you can stick to for longer than 10 minutes doesn't mean striving for perfection. It’s about being more consistent (daily-ish) with healthier, meaningful habits, even when you CBA 90% of the time!

This isn’t motivational fluff or ‘wellness’ lectures, it’s real education on how your brain, body, and habits actually work.

No fancy graphs or wacky Canva presentations, just the stuff you need to know!

Content designed to be consumed on the sofa, your commute, in bed or whilst taking a dump!

Additional Topics include:

Menopause: How it screws with your energy, appetite, sleep, and sanity and strategies that actually help

Sleep: Practical fixes that don’t involve a 5-hour wind-down routine and 12 hours in bed

Mindful Eating: What it actually looks like without chewing slowly in a yoga pose or lighting a fart scented candle

Body Confidence: Without the toxic positivity or self-love bullshit

Food Noise: How to curb cravings, and gain more control and clarity with disordered eating and binges

Discipline vs Motivation: Why relying on motivation guarantees you’ll quit when you have a couple of bad days

Snacking: How to start inhaling more from pleasure, not boredom

Exercise Jargon: So you don’t feel like an idiot when you're in the gym

GLP-1 Weight Loss Drugs: Adding in daily movement, protein, fibre, and maximising your chances of losing fat and gaining lean muscle, and ongoing support if you decide to come off your medication

TAKE THE PLUNGE

Please enjoy the biggest FAQ ever produced, helping you fill any holes (steady)

FAQ Section - Team Rotter

Frequently Asked Questions

How do I join?
Click any big red button, take 15 seconds to leave your details, and I'll reach out within an hour to confirm if we're a good fit. If it's after 9 pm (I'm old), I'll reply in the morning.
What happens after I sign up?
You'll get access to the app, complete a short onboarding form, and receive a welcome walkthrough that explains precisely what to do next. Your training, nutrition guidance, and habits are set up so you're not guessing from day one.
Do I need to join a gym?
No. We have home and gym programmes. Some people choose to do a bit of both, others only train from home. This is not another group programme that forces you into an environment you hate (the gym).
I don't have any equipment. Is that a problem?
No. You don't need any equipment to get started. Great results are possible with just your bodyweight, and each program is designed to work with whatever you have available.
I haven't exercised since PE. Is this suitable for me?
Yes. A lot of people joining are starting from exactly that point. This isn't built for people who already love training. It's built for people who feel out of practice or unsure where to start.
What if I have a lot of weight to lose?
The whole idea is starting you where you're at. If structured exercise isn't realistic right now, we start with what is--like short walks or small diet changes first.
What if I hate this or you? Is there a money-back guarantee?
Yes. If you give it a proper try and decide it's not for you, you'll get a full refund. No awkward back-and-forth. No loopholes.
How much 1-1 support do I actually get?
Alongside the Weekly Whinges, I'll be posting daily in the group and running live sessions. For more intense 1-1 support, we can discuss if coaching is best for you.
Will this work if I'm injured?
Yes. Everything is adapted around injuries, aches, pains, and limitations. If something hurts, it gets swapped. You won't be pushed through pain.
Will this work if I'm perimenopausal or menopausal?
Yes. Many people joining are peri or menopausal. Training adjusts around energy, joints, and recovery. Nutrition stays realistic--not extreme.
Is this suitable for men as well?
Absolutely! Whether you're starting from scratch, injured, knackered, or fed up with winging it, Team Rotter is the place for you.
What if I miss a few days or fall behind?
Nothing bad happens. This isn't a six-week shred. Life gets busy--you pick up where you left off. Consistency over time beats perfection.
Do I have to track calories?
No. Tracking is an option, not a requirement. If tracking isn't right for you, we'll use habits, portions, routine, and consistency instead.
Where do I log my food?
First, log everything inside the app. Long-term, Nutracheck is also an option. They offer a trial, and I can give you a discount code.
Can you write me a meal plan?
No--we don't write meal plans on purpose. Meal plans tell you what to eat but don't teach you nutrition. You get a personalised calorie range instead.
How many strength workouts per week?
You can choose 1, 2, 3, or 4 sessions weekly. Beginners: 2 sessions is ideal. Consistency is more important than doing too much.
Do you support people using GLP-1 meds (Wegovy, Mounjaro)?
Yes. Coaching helps protect/build muscle and develop long-lasting habits. Support continues even if you come off the meds.
Is the monthly subscription a contract?
No. No long-term contract. Cancel anytime.
What if I can't make the Weekly Whinge calls?
Every call is recorded. Watch anytime. You can send questions even if you can't attend live.
How quickly will I see results?
Most notice improvements in strength and energy in a few weeks. Long-term results take time--which is why we avoid quick-fix programmes.

"Empowering you to ditch your all-or-nothing self-sabotaging habits and FINALLY give the 🖕to your yo-yo diet and half-arsed exercise routine."

© 2025 All Rights Reserved 

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